Running UpdateCountdown to San Diego – The Shrinking Jeans of Lisa

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May 10, 2010 By lisa

Yesterday, I did my long run for Team in Training.  I *ran* 8.5 miles.

To say it sucked would be putting it lightly.  Here is what I posted at www.dailymile.com.

I don’t even know what to write. How about this? I cried my entire drive home. Disappointed. Pensive. Tired. Ache-y. Relief. Pressure. Mad. Emotional. So much more…..

Taking on running and this half marathon journey has been the most difficult thing I have ever done physically. Running does not come naturally to me, it is not easy, I could stand to lose a “few” pounds, etc etc. I want it to be easier for me, but it is not. I want to cut myself some slack and just be happy with the journey but apparently, I am not there yet. I want to be lighter on my feet as I run. I want to relish how far I have come but instead, I focus on how far I have yet to go. I am trying to reach a place of Zen, where I can just “let it go” and relax. I am not there yet.

With one day behind that horrible run, I am not feeling so low.  My legs don’t hurt as much as they did yesterday and my spirit is a little more positive….not quite back to my uber-positive self, but slowly mending itself.

Running long distances is so much harder than the shorter distances.  I can remember thinking back in February- What’s the big deal?  Bring on that stinkin’ half marathon.

How naive I was about this journey.

I have never worked so much, nor for so long, with such aching muscles, tired muscles, a weary spirit, so very tired all of the time.  That’s just the physical part of it.  Then, there is the mental part of running and a whole lot of it is mental. 

Like yesterday. 

My brain was bringing me way way way down and I pretty much had an entire sucky day of suck because of my horrible run and because I just couldn’t shake it off.

I was talking to Christy about all of this and I said to her:  I want to get back to where I actually ENJOY running, where it doesn’t hurt from all of the wear and tear, where I am running for me and not for a race.  I will get back to that place.

But first, I will finish my goal of running a half marathon, raising buttloads of money for Leukemia & Lymphoma Society and meeting my fellow Team Shrinking Jeans teammates in the process.

I’ll be OK.  I will reach that place of Zen…..one day.

  • Miles run since I started tracking my running in Nov 2009: 327.98
  • Miles this past week: 16
  • Miles since I started training on 01/31/10: 170.02
  • Miles to go until San Diego:  66.5
  • I’m still about $100 dollars short of my fundraising goal if anyone has anything left to give : ).  Click here.