True Confessions:: Guest Post | The Sisterhood of the Shrinking Jeans LLC


We thought we would switch things up this week and feature someone else’s confessions! Christy and I both agreed that one man in particular would be an awesome choice and lucky for us, he agreed. I mean, what man WOULDN’T want to be featured on a site that screams estrogen, right?

He is very, very brave.

If you are not familiar with Tony, you may want to read this interview. Amazing, I tell you! He writes here and interacts with his gazillion fans on Facebook, and you can also engage in an enthralling conversation with him, 140 characters at a time, here. Tony has a kick-ass sense of humor and he never fails to tell it like it is. Let’s make him feel at home, so maybe he’ll come back for more! Thanks, Tony!!

I am so excited to be invited here to Blogher…..huh, wait, what did you say? Oh, sorry… I am so excited to be invited here as a guest speaker at The Sisterhood of the Shrinking Jeans. I was a little shocked because, well, if you look to the right every member has a headband. I do not have a headband.

The truth is I love this place. Where women call each other “hookas and biatches”. Where they call their group the hood. Where Melissa loves the song “Islands In The Stream” (Confession of Melissa: I am playing this song while I complete this post).

But today I am going to lead the Tuesday True Confessions. I am going to tell you all of my dark and dirty secrets. I am going to let you in on a few surprises….

Ehhh, I am going to be very sarcastic. Well, maybe not!

1. I once got busy in a Burger King Bathroom- I am a food addict. When I was over 400 pounds, I would eat close to 10,000 calories on a normal day. I lived right near a BK, and I would spend close to $25 per trip there. Most of the time, I would go through the Drive-Thru because I was embarrassed to eat inside. Once, I did order food inside, and I ate it in the bathroom so other people would not watch me eat.

2. Fame!- In school, I used to dream about being famous. For a long time, I thought it was going to be like a Chris Farley route. I was fat and funny. Most of the time, overweight people make fun of themselves, people laugh, and they become popular. I look at it a little differently now. I think one day I will be famous, but for the right reasons. If not, I am okay with that. I am blessed with a great family.

3. Love!- I fell in love with my wife when I met her. She is everything I could want from a woman. Smart, sense of humor, and loves to shop for clothes. Okay, I could do without the clothes. I do not think I will ever meet another woman like her. Now, I get a couple of looks from the ladies, but in my mind I ask “Would you look at me if I were 420 pounds?” My wife did.

4. Blog- I love to blog, but I really love the social media thing. I really do believe that Facebook/Twitter are things of the future. I always hated MySpace. It never made sense to me. But Facebook does make sense. Twitter makes sense as well. My wife had to beg me to join Facebook. I never wanted to because I would not put up a picture of myself. That sounds weird since my whole social media existence has to dowith my before and current pictures. I did something weird this week. I have turned off comments on my blog before, but I now did it for good. I do feel that communication on Facebook and Twitter are going to
be the way to go for many bloggers.

5. Future- I am not nervous about the future. I believe that I will always land on my feet. Okay, those are my confessions. Oh, I also have a crush on Melissa. Anyone that can take care of twins and run everyday…VAVAVA-VOOM! (