February 9, 2011 By christieo
Yesterday I found myself with my face in the fridge and I was spooning out heaping spoonfuls of cheesecake.
It was not one of my prouder moments.
You can say I was trying not to make a lot of noise to wake the kids or that I was trying to minimize the damage by having “just a spoonful” but really I looked like a cheesecake addict getting her fix and the only noise I was trying to reduce was the noise in my own head. But it didn’t work! And by the way, it wasn’t one spoonful. I went in for more and I’m guessing it was more than a nice clean slice would have been by the way it was pulverized when I was done.
I caught myself in the act and threw out that damn cheesecake because honestly I am to the point now where it CANNOT EVEN ENTER MY HOME.
I don’t like myself when I get to the point where I cannot even trust myself or control myself. When I let food overrun my life. And now it’s overrunning all the hours I am putting in at the gym. The same slippery slope I had with food is never going to go away, it’s apparent now and that scares me.
I’m not feeling really good about myself right now. But at least the pantry is clean and the junk is out of the house and hopefully I will have a happier report next week.