January 5, 2013 by heather
Tap, tap…
Psssst….
Is this thing on?
Oh. Ma. Gah. I can’t believe I haven’t posted here in well, an embarassingly long time.
Truth is, I’ve struggled a lot this last year. My OTHER personal blog has gone the way of the dinosaur as well. I kind of went in my shell a bit. Okay, I went in A LOT. Also, I’ve been hard at work at Shrinking Kitchen.
Therein lies the problem. I’ve been cooking and testing so much food (yes, it’s light, but not when you test. And test. AND TEST) that I have competely lost control of my body.
The eating and ahem…the lack of exercise. I SWORE I’d never let myself get here, yet here I am – and I’m pissed at myself. I’m angry when I can’t get into even my FAT clothes. That I have lines on my skin where my jeans dig into my chunk. That every photo I see of myself makes me avert my eyes.
Here is the trick. I need to forgive myself. Then kick myself in the ass. HARD.
So here I am.
The truth is ugly, and it hurts sometimes. But being honest with myself and taking control is the only way I’ll get back to where I want to be. And feel like myself again.
So here I go again (I hope you just heard Whitesnake in your head right there).
Now. Goals.
1. I will lose 40 pounds this year. It sounds like a lot. But I need to lose that much. And probably about 15 more. Here’s what: I want to drop at least 15 by March.
2. I will get at least three days of cardio in per week and at least one day of strength/stretching.
3. I will take time to take care of myself. I’m not talking extravagant stuff here. I’m talking showers – daily showers. Washing my face at night. Sitting down to eat rather than eating as I’m standing and feeding the kids and doing dishes.
4. I will shoot for at least four races this year. Hmmm. Let’s say two 5k’s, a 10k and a half. Bare minimum.
Wow. Just looking at that seems overwhelming. However, I’ve done it before. I know I can do it again.
eek.
Okay. Let’s do this. BREAK!
