Normally my true confessions posts consist mainly of embarrassing choices regarding food.
Today, I’m going a different direction.
I’m going to talk about my feelings. Buckle up. I’m pregnant and emotional and its not pretty.
In less than three weeks, unless baby decides to come early, I will be a mother of two.
And truthfully? I’m terrified. Admitting how scared I am makes me feel horrible. I mean, I should be all excited. But right now? I wouldn’t mind if she stayed in and cooked longer. Cause I have NO IDEA how I’m going to care for two children.
Will my first child resent me? Can I give them both enough attention? Will I ever get to exercise again? Or sleep?
Logically I know that I’ll just do it. Cause that’s what you do. You handle it.
But the uncertainty and the fear of failure keeps creeping up on me. Waking me at night ( or is that the urge to pee?).
I will do fine, I will be fine. But seriously? I hate the doubt and I hate the guilt I feel because of the doubt.
Being scared of a transition that so many seem to make seamlessly ( not just once, but sometimes several times over) is an emotion that is, frankly, ugly.
And while I know this isn’t directly weight loss or health related, I wanted to be real today. Expressing our fears, whatever they may be, is a good thing.
I know the Sisterhood is here for me. We’re all here for each other.
So that’s today’s confession. Join me if you’d like…with the traditional confession. Or tell us what scares you. Or what’s pissing you off. Whatever.
Get it off your chest.
And breathe with me.